Dance After Dark Photography

I don’t often let people get to me, but this guy just didn’t seem to understand the nature of computers. He was running a traceroute out through the network and back to his own static IP address and getting timeouts & slow responses. I explained that certain parts of the network limit traceroute traffic to improve overall performance, so a timeout may not really indicate a problem. We ran a few different speedtests as an alternate measure, and he got near-stellar results on every one.

Still not satisfied, he said:
“I don’t care what the speedtest says. That’s not the speed I’m actually getting. You have to resolve this.”

Well, sir, a web-based speedtest is dependent on network traffic, so it can return results a little slower than the speeds you’re actually getting, but I don’t believe it’s possible for a speedtest to give you results that are higher than your actual speed unless there’s a problem with your computer or your local network. Even then, it would generally reflect network problems. That’s why we ask that you bypass all of your equipment and connect directly to ours to compare results.

Went on for about 20 minutes because he insisted his network was fine. Finally, as a “we won’t just give up on you” measure, I referred him to our speed department via e-mail. I knew they couldn’t do anything further, but at least it gave him an option. The guy never quite broke the Rude Threshold, but he wasn’t accepting what I told him. I don’t B.S. people, so having someone flat-out deny a pretty clear fact bothered me. On Christmas Eve, no less.

Imagine my surprise when the guy called back 5 minutes later to apologize. He had an issue with his firewall slowing down traffic on a few major ports. 80 was good, hence the speedtest results, but his traceroutes and some of his other dealings were being slowed to a crawl. He asked for my supervisor to thank me for remaining professional and helpful despite (in his words) “my attitude and unprofessionalism.”

You just don’t get that very often. A genuinely nice person who can admit to being wrong and make the effort to call back and apologize. Blew my mind.

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